- by Carrie Shaw
- on June 8, 2025
What Is Love?
“Love is love” is one of the most common phrases of our time, meant to end debate and silence opposition. It suggests that love, in any form, must be accepted as good and true simply because it is love.
But the question we should be asking, particularly if we’re approaching this topic from a biblical perspective, is not “Is it love?” but “What is love?“
Is love whatever feels good, whatever affirms us, whatever includes us without challenge? Or is it something deeper? Something that calls us not just to be seen, but to be changed?
If God is love (1 John 4:8), then surely it’s His definition – not ours – that we must return to. Not every form of love is holy. Not every expression of love is good. Not every desire that feels loving is in line with what God calls love.
In a recent video for Pride Month, former pastor and now online influencer David Hayward – known as the Naked Pastor – argues that love is indiscriminate. Like gravity or sunlight, he says, it simply exists and applies to all. He claims that any form of theological disagreement with LGBTQ+ practice is a catastrophic misunderstanding of love.
But Scripture paints a different picture – a richer, deeper, more costly picture of love. Real love says: this is serious, but I will lay down my life for you.
Love Rejoices in the Truth
In 1 Corinthians 13 – the famous “love chapter” – Paul makes a profound statement:
“Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.” | 1 Corinthians 13:6
In other words, real love is not morally neutral. It does not celebrate every choice or affirm every feeling. Instead, love is anchored in truth – God’s truth.
When the Naked Pastor says that love is like the rain or sun, falling on everyone without distinction, he confuses God’s kindness (Matthew 5:45) with God’s love as covenant faithfulness. God’s general kindness toward humanity does not mean that He affirms all behaviours or blesses every lifestyle.
Biblical love rejoices when someone turns from sin. It does not excuse sin in the name of compassion. It does not trade holiness for harmony. Love, in Scripture, is not a feeling. It is a posture of obedience. It is shaped by truth – even when that truth is uncomfortable. As 1 John 5:3 comments, “This is love for God: to keep his commands.”
Jesus Was Compassionate But He Never Compromised
Jesus was radically welcoming. He ate with sinners. He touched the unclean. He welcomed the outcast.
But he never left them where they were.
When addressing the woman caught in adultery, he told her “Neither do I condemn you… Go now and leave your life of sin” (John 8:11). His mercy didn’t excuse sin – it made a way for change. It compelled truth-telling and offered grace, leading to transformation.
Jesus never said, “Come as you are – and stay as you are.” He said, “Follow me.” And following meant turning away from old ways (Luke 9:23), denying self, and learning obedience.
Biblical repentance includes the reality of acknowledging sin and brokenness, our need for restoration and renewal, and turning from that sin to the One who can heal us and make us whole.
This matters because the message of the Naked Pastor is that any restriction or boundary – particularly around sexual ethics – is inherently unloving. But Jesus always spoke the truth, even when it confronted cultural norms. He always loved, but never by lowering the call to holiness.
Holiness requires us to say yes to some things and no to others – boundaries that we submit to in pursuit of God’s definition of holiness and love in its fullest expression.
God’s Love Is Always Holy
The idea that love is indiscriminate misunderstands the nature of divine love. God’s love is freely offered – but it is never casual. It is holy love. “As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had… But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do.” | Peter 1:14–15
Scripture further elaborates, going so far as to state that “without holiness, no one will see the Lord.” | Hebrews 12:14
Holiness is not the enemy of love. It is the expression of it. God does not love us by affirming our sin. He loves us by calling us out of it – into something better.
That’s why the cross matters. Jesus took sin seriously enough to die for us. At the cross, Jesus took the full penalty of sin – death – upon himself. He offered his perfect life in place of our imperfect one, bridging the separation between humanity and the Father. In doing so, he fully satisfied both divine justice and divine mercy.
If sin did not matter, there would be no need for atonement. But love and justice met at the cross – not to ignore God’s holiness but to fulfil it (Romans 3:26).
To Disagree Is Not to Dehumanise
One of the more troubling claims in the Naked Pastor’s video is that refusing to affirm LGBTQ+ practice is the same as marginalising or persecuting people. But disagreement is not hate. Upholding a biblical sexual ethic is not bigotry – and it certainly is not violence.
If it were, Jesus himself would stand accused. He warned, “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction.” | Matthew 7:13
The reality is this: the church has always been exclusive. Not based on status, background, or identity – but based on surrender to Christ. The call of Jesus is open to all, but it is not unconditional. It requires repentance, faith, and obedience.
To be excluded from the church due to unrepentant sin is not dehumanising. It is the sober response of a holy community, shaped by the commands of a holy God.
The gospel is not: “You’re fine as you are.” The gospel is: “You are loved – now come, die to yourself, and live.“
That is not exclusion. That is invitation – on God’s terms, not ours.
You Can’t Have Love Without Lordship
The Naked Pastor argues that if love is not universal and unqualified, it isn’t love at all. He concludes that any church that refuses to affirm same-sex relationships has a catastrophic misunderstanding of love.
But Scripture tells a different story.
Jesus consistently links love with obedience – not affirmation. True love for God is shown not by celebrating what we feel, but by submitting to what He commands.
He makes note in John 14 (v21) that “Whoever has my commands and keeps them is the one who loves me” and further in verse 23, that “If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching.” (John 14:23)
He further affirms the connection between lordship and love in Luke 6:46, where he says, “Why do you call me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ and do not do what I say?“
Just as the Father loved him, so he has loved us. Now, to remain in that love, we must keep his commandments (John 15:9 – 10).
Love, according to Jesus, means living under his Lordship. Not because we’re trying to earn His love – but because we already have it, and we trust Him enough to obey.
Love is not agreement with every desire. It is not the celebration of every identity. Love tells the truth – and then walks patiently beside us as we learn to live it out.
The church has not always modelled this well. At times, it has been harsh and lacking grace. But the answer is not to abandon truth. It is to return to Jesus – full of grace and truth (John 1:14).
The kind of love that saves is not a love that affirms everything. It is a love that transforms everything.
Let’s Be Clear About Words Like Genocide
In his video, the Naked Pastor makes a devastating and deeply misleading connection: suggesting that theological disagreement with LGBTQ+ practice is part of a trajectory that leads to genocide. That claim is not just untrue – it’s dangerous and irresponsible.
Genocide is the systemic and intentional eradication of a people group. It is built on hatred, dehumanisation, and violence. To equate the historic Christian sexual ethic – which calls every person to repentance and holiness under the lordship of Christ – with acts of genocide is not only a falsehood, it trivialises the real suffering of those who have endured such horrors.
Christians who hold to biblical teaching on sexuality are not advocating for harm, violence, or erasure. They are proclaiming a gospel that applies equally to all people: a call to die to self and find new life in Jesus.
If everything short of affirmation is labelled as hatred, there is no room left for meaningful conversation – only coercion. And that is neither just nor loving.
Conclusion: Love That Tells the Truth
The world says, “Love is love”, indiscriminately and without qualification.
But God says, “I am love.” And the love He gives is not a vague feeling or blanket affirmation. It is holy. It is truthful. It is costly.
Love without truth is hollow. Truth without love is harsh. But love that tells the truth – even when it’s hard – is the love that Jesus lived and died to give us.
If we want to understand what Christianity truly teaches about God, sin, love, and salvation, we need to come face to face with the cross. This is Christianity 101. It’s not a vague philosophy or moral encouragement. It is a divine rescue.
The cross demonstrates that God does not leave us in our sin. He calls us to come, to turn, to follow because He loves us enough not to leave us where we are.
So now, as ambassadors of that love – not the world’s love, but Christ’s – I echo the cry of Paul:
“And now, we plead, be reconciled to God.” | 2 Corinthians 5:20
Not affirmed in brokenness, but restored in wholeness. Not encouraged in sin, but welcomed in grace. Not left as you are – but made new in Christ.
